First Penis Transplant Reversed

Reuters is reporting that the first recipient of a penis transplant has had it removed 2 weeks after it was attached. Surgeons attached the new organ after an accident had severely damaged the original. There were no signs that his body was rejecting the new organ, but apparently the recipient and his wife could not get used to it.

Forget about those urban legends about waking up in a hotel bathtub merely missing a kidney....

Comments

mediageek | September 19, 2006, 2:03pm | #

What?! No reference to King Missile's seminal 1993 hit Detachable Penis?

Jesse "Percy" Walker | September 19, 2006, 2:06pm | #

Yeah we gotta go back to the way the good Lord maaaaaade us all...

sage +P | September 19, 2006, 2:12pm | #

With a foreskin? Keep it, Jesse, I don't roll in a covered wagon.

Joseph Majsterski | September 19, 2006, 2:16pm | #

Yeah, I have a feeling this is one organ that will never be transplantable, really. The only thing I could see happening is sex change operations, where there was never an original to be used to.

Cab | September 19, 2006, 2:17pm | #

"There had been no signs of the 10-centimetre (4-inch) organ being rejected by the recipient's body."

I guess I can see why the wife rejected it. The new, improved, larger, 2007 models must have just hit the shelves.

Lamar | September 19, 2006, 2:25pm | #

"First Penis Transplant Reversed"
I always thought the was something up with that mannish looking Jenna.

Lamar | September 19, 2006, 2:25pm | #

"First Penis Transplant Reversed"
I always thought there was something up with that mannish looking Jenna.

Ethan | September 19, 2006, 2:36pm | #

apparently the recipient and his wife could not get used to it.

What does that mean? Was it too loud? Did it insist on dominating the remote control? Have poor taste in music? Keep odd hours? Smoke? Have rabid right-wing political views? Cook too many odd-smelling ethnic dishes? Ok, I'll stop.

But 2 weeks! They barely gave the little guy a chance.

David | September 19, 2006, 2:42pm | #

Talk about the perfect being the enemy of the good.

Stevo Darkly | September 19, 2006, 2:48pm | #

Oh! When I first read the headline, I actually thought it had been transplanted in reverse, which would be really inconvenient.

happyjuggler0 | September 19, 2006, 3:01pm | #

apparently the recipient and his wife could not get used to it.

What, they prefer no penis at all? That is one screwed up couple.

Mr. Nice Guy | September 19, 2006, 3:08pm | #

I want to be a dick donor just so I can have that printed on my drivers' license.

Jeff P | September 19, 2006, 3:15pm | #

Isn't there a joke that goes "She's so ugly, I wouldn't fuck her with YOUR dick."

smacky | September 19, 2006, 3:16pm | #

Oh! When I first read the headline, I actually thought it had been transplanted in reverse, which would be really inconvenient.


I could be wrong, but IIRC, that is essentially how Male-to-Female sex changes are done.

GILMORE | September 19, 2006, 3:16pm | #

Keep hope alive, Ron. Science marches on.

The question that no one asked here... uh, whats the deal with the *donor*?

You'd have to assume one of a few very creepy possibilites:

a) dead person (eeeeeewww!)
b) post-op transgender leftovers? (eeeeeeeeeewww!)
c) ....someone carrying around 2 sets, and had to choose? Herm-aphroditey, that is.

In all cases here, you're not exactly getting Grade A replacement parts. I mean, there's a *reason* they offered these things up.

Hmm. Cloning ....John Holmes for parts...?

And I'm out! (cue Bionic Man sound)

mk | September 19, 2006, 3:31pm | #

He couldn't have waited any longer. The warranty on a used penis is two weeks.

mk | September 19, 2006, 3:39pm | #

I could be wrong, but IIRC, that is essentially how Male-to-Female sex changes are done.

Yup. I saw a film of the procedure once (as the background of a Butthole Surfers show). It was one of the most horrifying things I've ever seen.

a warm gun (bang bang shoot shoot) | September 19, 2006, 3:44pm | #

http://bmj.bmjjournals.com/cgi/content/full/321/7276/1576/a

vanya | September 19, 2006, 3:46pm | #

It sounded from the article like the organ was alive but it may not have been sexually functional and it's not clear how much feeling the man actually had in his new organ. Maybe having a dead man's permanently flacid penis flapping around is worse than no penis at all.

Or maybe the penis had started talking to him at night. There has to be horror film potential in this.

Number 6 | September 19, 2006, 4:22pm | #

China- For the first time in history, a man has uttered the phrase, "Please cut my penis off." Story continued on page 3

some guy | September 19, 2006, 4:34pm | #

Wow mediageek, I had completely forgotten about that band (owing partly to the fact that the only thing I have by them was recorded on a cassette now lying somewhere in a dusty box). FWIW, Pickaxe was an especially good song. Thanks for the reminder, it's definitely iPod worthy.

some guy | September 19, 2006, 4:43pm | #

MK, I didn't get to see that particular Butthole Surfers tour, but I heard about it. Apparently a few people passed out at the local club in Houston.

Who knew a penis transplant surgery story would bring up all these punk memories.

Of course this post would be incomplete without a reference to the legendary DK album, Plastic Surgery Disasters.

Lamar | September 19, 2006, 4:46pm | #

John Hall got me my first gig at Sidewalk Cafe. Fortunately, he found his penis before the song was over.

toxie | September 19, 2006, 5:03pm | #

Vanya,

Thanks for reminding me of the Troma "penis monster" series of horror movies.

Herrick and His Balls | September 19, 2006, 5:14pm | #

2 WEEKS!! DAMN!!!

Whenever I am the recipient of a new penis, it's usually out of me in a matter of minutes.

enough already | September 19, 2006, 5:19pm | #

http://www.jewishsightseeing.com/jewish_humor/punchlines_and_their_jokes/2006-06-01-Number%2010.htm

Ayatollah Usoe | September 19, 2006, 5:22pm | #

If one masturbates on a penis that he wasn't born with, is that gay?

pogo sticky | September 19, 2006, 5:43pm | #

masturbates on a penis

You betcha.

MainstreamMan | September 19, 2006, 6:19pm | #

FYI

The surgical team claims the operation was a success. After 10 days, tests revealed the organ had a rich blood supply and the man was able to urinate normally...Andrew George, a transplant expert at Imperial College, London, said: "Doing a penis transplant should be no more complex than anything else. But it takes time for nerve sensations to kick in and it's not clear whether the patient would ever be able to have sex with it. The question is whether it's right to be doing a transplant for what may be seen as cosmetic reasons."

Mrs Ayn Randian | September 19, 2006, 6:25pm | #

Um.....how big was it? is it on ice????

mrs ayn randian | September 19, 2006, 6:30pm | #

um... how big is it? Is it on ice????

Stevo Darkly | September 19, 2006, 6:45pm | #

Wait wait wait! I have much confusion here.

I said: "Oh! When I first read the headline, I actually thought it had been transplanted in reverse, which would be really inconvenient."

smacky said: "I could be wrong, but IIRC, that is essentially how Male-to-Female sex changes are done."

mk added: "Yup. I saw a film of the procedure once (as the background of a Butthole Surfers show). It was one of the most horrifying things I've ever seen."

Huhs? With a male-to-female sex change, they would just take the penis off. Or did you mean the reverse: F-to-M?

What I meant was, I my first thought from reading the headline was that they installed the new penis backwards. Are you saying that's what they actually do in a F-to-M conversion? But isn't the thingy made to facilitate the flow of everything from back to front? And plus then you would need to take off the front cap and put it around on the other side. Why make this extra work?

So many questions. And so many answers that perhaps I don't really want to know.

biologist | September 19, 2006, 7:42pm | #

stevo:

in a M to F operation, the penis is cut open, the contents removed, it is sewn shut and pushed backwards, outside in, up into the body cavity to form a pocket analogous to the vagina

obviously, I'm skipping some details here, but that's the essence

GILMORE | September 19, 2006, 8:02pm | #

Vanya mused =
. Maybe having a dead man's permanently flacid penis flapping around is worse than no penis at all.


thats one of the funniest sentences i've read in ages.

I really wish people hadnt described the thing about going M->F. I dont feel well.

How much does it cost to go M->BMF?

JG

Zach | September 19, 2006, 8:16pm | #

I can that the clock is always pointed at 4:20 on the offices of reason.

The Monsters of Reason Produce Sleep | September 19, 2006, 8:32pm | #

http://tinyurl.com/rah6r

matthew hogan | September 19, 2006, 9:39pm | #

If there is a rebate, do you have to like mail in the foreskin?

treefroggy | September 19, 2006, 10:22pm | #

Wait a minute: Wasn't this originally a Vietnam Era joke involving:

1) A GI with drug resistant VD.
2) A Vietnamese doctor.

The punch line was something like " Give it two weeks, it fall off by itself"

make4myday | September 19, 2006, 11:04pm | #

OFF-TOPIC...

Not that I wouldn't love to see pot legalized BUT...

I'd sure like to see a reason H&R about how ole Willy N. walks away on misdemeanor charges with 1 1/2 lbs. of pot + some shrooms...yet the poor ole regular joes end up with felony charges and possibly years in prison..any takers on this one?

Stevo Darkly | September 19, 2006, 11:15pm | #

biologist -- Thank you for explaining. And thank you for skipping some details. That was precisely the right amount of detail that I needed.

I confess I was so fixated on the "get rid of the penis" problem that it didn't even occur to me to think about the "make something like a vagina" problem that would necessarily follow.

crimethink | September 19, 2006, 11:55pm | #

You can take my penis from my cold, dead hands.

Happy Jack | September 20, 2006, 12:28am | #

Or maybe the penis had started talking to him at night

I take it you've never seen Chatterbox.

vanya | September 20, 2006, 10:37am | #

I'll throw Chatterbox on my netflix queue. I see the Dorrie film Ich und Er has got the talking penis angle covered.

MainstreamMan | September 20, 2006, 1:32pm | #

"Or maybe the penis had started talking to him at night"

and maybe it was Ronald Reagon doing the talking...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ed_the_Happy_Clown

NoStar | September 20, 2006, 1:49pm | #

The operation to attach the penis to the body is
an addadictomy.

The operation to remove the penis is too painful to think about.

NoStar | September 20, 2006, 1:58pm | #

The situation may not be totally hopeless. Do they sell Snap-On-Tools in China?

NoStar | September 20, 2006, 2:02pm | #

The situation may not be totally hopeless. Do they sell Snap-On-Tools in China?

MUTT | September 20, 2006, 7:08pm | #

Unsolicited apology. My "Mrs Randian" post was below the belt. FWIW, I apologize, Ayn R.
I will confine the flat of my sword (which you have more than earned) higher up.
This is a remarkably civilized space. I am ashamed I allowed myself to use it for a cheap, gratuitous shot.

smacky | September 23, 2006, 8:37pm | #

The operation to remove the penis is too painful to think about.

It's known as a lobitoffamy.