Ah, Freedom

You can't script this stuff:

Organizers of the Pentagon's 9/11 memorial Freedom Walk on Sunday are taking extraordinary measures to control participation in the march and concert, with the route fenced off and lined with police and the event closed to anyone who does not register online by 4:30 p.m. today.

The march, sponsored by the Department of Defense, will wend its way from the Pentagon to the Mall along a route that has not been specified but will be lined with four-foot-high snow fencing to keep it closed and "sterile," said Allison Barber, deputy assistant secretary of defense.

Comments

Jim Henley | September 9, 2005, 6:05pm | #

No link? CANCEL MY SUBSCRIPTION!!

Also, uh, First.

trainwreck | September 9, 2005, 6:08pm | #

Link?

xray | September 9, 2005, 6:14pm | #

this stuff

Warren | September 9, 2005, 6:20pm | #

Well they came up with an appropriate name for the march didn’t they? I assume all the registered pedestrians will be memorializing the freedom they lost on 9/11.

smacky | September 9, 2005, 6:21pm | #

What about the full body condoms? "Sterile", my ass.

ChicagoTom | September 9, 2005, 6:27pm | #

Sign up for the freedom walk now and you even get your own commemorative freedom walk dog tags

I bet these are gonna be quite the collector's item

ralphus | September 9, 2005, 6:29pm | #

This has been the most depressing day of posts ever.

Larry | September 9, 2005, 6:32pm | #

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

BAI | September 9, 2005, 6:48pm | #

I'm willing to bet they extend the signup deadline. I'm sure that even the Fox-News zombies will be put off by the cost of travel these days.

Rimfax | September 9, 2005, 7:36pm | #

Could this super secret route from the Pentagon to the Lincoln Memorial be the same super secret route that every other walk/ride/crawl event uses from the Pentagon to the National Mall? Gee, I wonder if they're gonna cross the bridge that leads directly to the Lincoln Memorial and has minimal traffic or if they'll go miles out of the way to close one of the bridges that always have heavy traffic.

[Warning: bitter rhetoric ahead] Brilliant. Slap Berger on the wrist for wallpapering his house with super secret docs (for which I would be knob polishing Bubba in Leavenworth for the next 10 years and my wife would be decorating her new cardboard home), but take extra care not to specify an obvious route for a "support" event.

dead_elvis | September 9, 2005, 8:00pm | #

Congratulations on resisting the usual "freedom's just another word for..." headline Reason writers usually use for these kinds of blog posts.

Freedom's just another word for better have your credentials in order.

Phil | September 9, 2005, 8:27pm | #

My favorite part is the three Freedom Pens that the media will be restricted to.

I'm very tempted to walk down to the Memorial Bridge on Sunday, then walk along the fence with a camera. I won't be trying to crash the march, and I'm not a member of the media . . . I wonder if they'd arrest me?

Tim | September 9, 2005, 8:36pm | #

What a crock of shit i have just read be it here or anywhere else, americans suck big time, think you all have watched to many hollywood movies, you aint nothing special at all, in fact it is widely said you are all so arrogant and ignorant and unruly, and ya stick ya noses in where it wanted at all, william wallace is what freedom is all about, not you bunch of poxy pretentious big worded know nothings.

JAT | September 9, 2005, 8:56pm | #

Speaking for me-self, I like "poxy pretentious big worded know nothings" better than "free minds and free markets."

Ruthless | September 9, 2005, 9:27pm | #

"Sterile" is the operative word?

No problemo.
This gun's only for fun.

Oh, yeah:
JAT,
What do "poxy" mean?

Ruthless | September 9, 2005, 9:30pm | #

Never mind, JAT,
Tim,
What do "poxy" mean?
epoxy I know.

Jack | September 9, 2005, 9:33pm | #

When you describe the condition of your own march as "sterile", that's some kind of psychopathology.

Ruthless | September 9, 2005, 9:40pm | #

Tim,
If I had a bumper sticker saying, "poxy pretentious big worded know nothings," I would dutifully affix it near the "standard" Reason bumper sticker there already on my Geo Metro Stickermobile.

I must warn you, however, that I have numerous, even pithier stickers affixed thereto.
Peace and love.

Stevo Darkly | September 9, 2005, 10:07pm | #

"Poxy" means "infected with the pox." It is an insult of olden pedigree.

Ruthless | September 9, 2005, 10:45pm | #

Stevo,
Are you tellin' me we have to score one for Tim?
Speaking of the wrong one winning... how about that Clisjters beating Maria Sharapova?

Goddess is not in her heaven, and all is not right here below. Duh.
(Clisjsters does have some alluring "junk in her trunk.")

Stevo,
Speaking of olden pedigrees, doesn't Clistjertz have something to do with evacuating?

J. Goard | September 10, 2005, 2:39am | #

POXY# (as we would write it), is unacceptable in the official list for North American Scrabble, but acceptable in the British list (and hence in the combined World list we call "SOWPODS"). It definitely leaves the dangerous front-hook, however.

Douglas Fletcher | September 10, 2005, 2:40am | #

Just thinking about how many times I drove along that route makes me glad I'm not there anymore.

smacky | September 10, 2005, 6:19am | #

Steve from Cleveland says what's up to the Chicago Hit and Run Crew August '05 and says that taxes should be increased twofold for all libertarians.

smacky | September 10, 2005, 6:32am | #

Steve also gives high five to Stevo.

JD | September 10, 2005, 8:13am | #

william wallace is what freedom is all about, not you bunch of poxy pretentious big worded know nothings.

Is that what it's about? Well, shit - bring me my broadsword and clear understanding, then.

Ruthless | September 10, 2005, 8:30am | #

"Speaking of olden pedigrees, doesn't Clistjertz have something to do with evacuating?"

Clyster means enema. I looked it up.

"Oh I've tried other enemas..."

The Wine Commonsewer | September 10, 2005, 10:33am | #

Officers are prepared to arrest anyone who joins the march or concert without a credential and refuses to leave

Because, well, we're FREE.

I just don't get this stuff. It would appear that the government is afraid the walk will be co-opted by the anti-war movement (or worse). But, these days it usually works the other way around--like in San Diego where the ant-war demonstrations have been co-opted by the other side. But still, if that fear is so pervasive why do the walk at all? Just skip the massive waste of taxpayer dollars and give a speech instead. Lots of people are LOL at you over this.

BAI | September 10, 2005, 11:42am | #

And after this godawful shameless spectacle, we'll have the 10th anniversary "march" of the Million Man March just a couple of weeks after the DoD dog and pony show.

From Rumsfeld marches to Farrakhan marches ... Man, as a cartoonist, I couldn't MAKE this stuff up!!

I hope all you D.C. residents that own coffee shops, hotels, pizza joints, etc. fleece all these marching idiots for all they got.

joe | September 10, 2005, 12:35pm | #

The tools who would actually participate in this rally are almost certain to be akin the people who smacked around the protestors in the Republic Convention last year.

We're going to see some great footage come out of this.

Rich Ard | September 10, 2005, 1:14pm | #

gaius must be looking forward to some dark amusement from getting to watch the proles march in lockstep on this one.

Maybe amusement isn't right - horror, perhaps?

mediageek | September 10, 2005, 6:07pm | #

Yes, but are they serving Freedom Fries?

/nothing like a re-heated joke.

Stevo Darkly | September 12, 2005, 6:17pm | #

Steve from Cleveland says what's up to the Chicago Hit and Run Crew August '05 and says that taxes should be increased twofold for all libertarians.

Steve also gives high five to Stevo.

Big ups to all my homeys and my fly honeys in the big 440 and the big 216, yo.

Stevo Darkly | September 12, 2005, 6:18pm | #

Oops, and the 312 and 736 too, of course.

Dogzilla | September 12, 2005, 7:48pm | #

Unintentional self-parody is the highest form of humor, but this one dangles its toes over the "creepy" line.